3 Point Stan
08-25-2009, 04:04 PM
Stadium Bursts Out Laughing After Jamie Moyer Pitch
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PHILADELPHIA—A subpar season during which Phillies pitcher Jamie Moyer has amassed a five-plus ERA and been demoted to the bullpen got worse Sunday after the 46-year-old veteran uncorked a 73-mph fastball, eliciting spontaneous laughter and giggles from each of the 43,489 fans at Citizens Bank Park. "I thought it was the most hilarious joke, but then I saw the look on his face and I realized he was serious," said attendee Matthew King, who added that he was barely able to keep a straight face for the rest of the game. "When the pitch speed didn't even register on the scoreboard, beer literally shot out my nose. My entire section was doubled over. Even the batter [Mark Reynolds] was just crying laughing." Immediately following the pitch, a tearful Moyer sprinted off the field and yelled at manager Charlie Manuel, saying that it was Manuel's fault that he was on the mound in the first place. http://www.theonion.com/content/themes/onion/assets/terminator.gif
http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/Phillies.article_large.jpg
PHILADELPHIA—A subpar season during which Phillies pitcher Jamie Moyer has amassed a five-plus ERA and been demoted to the bullpen got worse Sunday after the 46-year-old veteran uncorked a 73-mph fastball, eliciting spontaneous laughter and giggles from each of the 43,489 fans at Citizens Bank Park. "I thought it was the most hilarious joke, but then I saw the look on his face and I realized he was serious," said attendee Matthew King, who added that he was barely able to keep a straight face for the rest of the game. "When the pitch speed didn't even register on the scoreboard, beer literally shot out my nose. My entire section was doubled over. Even the batter [Mark Reynolds] was just crying laughing." Immediately following the pitch, a tearful Moyer sprinted off the field and yelled at manager Charlie Manuel, saying that it was Manuel's fault that he was on the mound in the first place. http://www.theonion.com/content/themes/onion/assets/terminator.gif